Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Wishes

I wished for a lot of different things during the years that Cory was being stabilized.  I wished for God to take the illness away.  I wished for the meds to work faster. I wished I could make her better.   I wished I had a partner in the household to help me keep things together.  I wished for sleep.  I wished for someone to take care of me when I felt absolutely worn out.


I seldom wished for Cory to be more cooperative.  It's only by seeing others in similar situations who remain stuck in denial, to their own detriment, that I  realize just what an amazing young woman Cory really was.  She was able to accept that she had an illness, in the first place.  That's not an easy thing to do, especially with the stigma that mental illness brings with it.


She learned about her illness, and built relationships with the people who could help her.  She took her meds, even though they never came without a price.  She struggled, sure. She took her time deciding who to tell, and how much.  But she was honest.  She was not ashamed of her illness.  She knew it was something that she had, not who she was.  She also knew she wanted to control her illness, rather than having it control her.


She didn't enjoy hurting herself or others, even if only with careless words.  She wanted to get better, and she was doing just that.


I am so proud of my girl, and so incredibly blessed that her hand was mine to hold.  I wouldn't have traded her for the world. Not a single moment.







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