Today, while napping, I had my favorite dream- the one in which she's home running around fine and they buried someone else in her box. I could feel her solid weight as she jumped into my lap and I could breathe her in as I kept asking her if she could believe the whole thing had been a mistake. Pure joy. Pure delight. Utter and sheer relief. The world was a safe place once again.
I wish I could touch her hair and hold her that close again. The dream was so vivid and shot my senses fuller than any illegal drug ever could. Somewhere, even while asleep, my subconscious knew the truth because the paranoia set in, wondering when this sweet respite would come to an end, which it did all too soon.
Oh my, the feeling of her in my arms one more time. People just don't know if they haven't experienced it.
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